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The Weed War

July 31st 2008 11:45
I'm talking about these weeds

'Weeds are my worst enemy!' I remember some gardenening bloke make that statement on an ad when i was a kid. And every time i saw it i remember laughing thinking how ridiculous that was. How could something so harmless and small be someones worst enemy? Of course when you're young, gardening is the last thing on your mind, it was a mum and dad thing and you assumed that they enjoyed it since they were out there almost every weekend. How wrong was i?

Having moved out of home some time ago and now owning my own home, i now find that statement to be truer than i gave it credit for. It's the middle of winter and yet i still find myself having to go out into the freezing winds and trying to keep these pests of the plant world at bay. Why is it that every other plant and tree i want to grow is dormant, when these pesky buggers are still thriving to the point where they are taking over? If they could just give me a few months off during the colder weather, i would be happy. But no, i have to go out and cull them because if i didn't, by spring, i would have my own mini version of the Amazon jungle in my backyard!
And where do they all come from? I know, people say the birds drop seeds everywhere, but i don't understand where birds go to provide me with a different strain of weed every 2 weeks. I guess i should consider getting rid of my 2 bird baths, maybe i'm just encouraging them. Whatever the reason, while i've tried some methods to keep them at bay, weedmats, newspaper, regular weedspraying, they seem to come back with a vengeance, more resilient that ever. Perhaps my only course of action is to concrete completely around my house. It seems a bit extreme, and not exactly aesthetically pleasing, but it would give me more time to indulge in other activities.
I'm not talking about this weed!


I know i'm not the only one who has this issue, it is a losing battle millions of people face across the globe. The green demons of nature will not stop, no matter what, and i think there should be some kind of greater awareness put forward to address these killers of time. They are the silent enemy, and while weeds are not my WORST enemy, they definitely rate highly. Let me be the first to declare war on them, they have been given notice. And if they don't adhere to my warning, there will be hell to pay!
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